I'm still here

I find it so difficult to sit down and right here these days. Before, when I would pump out two blogs a week some months, I was working and had the time to sit and write. Now, I'm at home most days with my son and it's not so easy to sit down and put my thoughts into words.

Also, I haven't been doing any karate (except of course in my mind, but that only gets you so far). My life has taken this turn, and not so much for the better. Tough economic times have finally hit Vermont and my husband and I have found ourselves victims. I don't mean to sound melodramatic, it's just the way things are right now. We moved away from our solid businesses at the wrong time. Now he and I both are having trouble finding work. People aren't doing any construction or paying for regular massage these days. Everyone is pinching their belts.

To add to that, I am having another baby. While that is extremely exciting (we have been talking about it for months now, but it seems it was decided for us...), I'm very scared for our futures. I have been doing nothing but massage therapy for ten years and it makes me so sad to think I have to switch gears. But, we need to think outside the box. I'm also not sure what I'm qualified to do, but will do the best I can to find something to bring some money home. My husband has to do this, as well.

As for the nurse practitioner program, I have yet to hear. A little birdie told me we should be hearing this week. However, being due in early October means that I may have to postpone school for a year. That would be okay. The program had 120 applicants. They only accept 16. Crazy odds!

So, back to karate. There just hasn't been time or babysitters. Now I have to take it easier on myself. I still go to the gym three days a week. What I need to do is find time to do kata. Once or twice a week. That's all. I have someone to practice self-defense techniques with, but again, I need to be careful there. It will happen again. I just have to keep telling myself that.

The most important part of all of this is to remain positive. We're not the only ones going through this hard time. Some have it so much worse than we do. I just want to be able to stay in my home (we rent), stay in Burlington, pay the bills and eat. It hasn't reached the place where we lose those things, and it won't.